Sunday Sunday...

I awoke at 3pm this afternoon to the sound of one of my fans blowing in the fresh air from beyond my curtains, birds churping and children playing in the distants. I sat up and checked the clock beside my bed 15:02 in green LED's. The sound of Spring fills my bedroom. And on the chair infront of me, a sight that rips that Spring feeling away like my soul on the wind. My work uniform. My mood turned as black as the fabric.

As per usual i go to the toilet after getting out of bed, both windows are open and the bright sun shine, the blue cloudless sky and a cool breeze reawakens that Spring feeling, i stand, releaving myself, and soaking up the gorgeous Spring air.

I have 2 hours before i have to go to work. Shit.

I stand at the bus stop, my face burning in the sun light, i move into the shade, the bus was empty most of the way to the tubestation, women with short skirts and strapless dresses sit around me, pink with a mild sun burn. I wait 10'ish minutes for my train, which at the last minute had a change for destination, which meant i had to change halfway. Shit. For the next 40 minutes i'll be underground in a metal cigar travelling through tunnels that were cut out of the London earth 150 years ago. I hate the London Underground, even more so in hot weather. I make one change, blissfully walking, trying not to care about the time. Once out of the sweat box i have nearly one mile of London city streets to walk, the suns out, and so i walk again without a care for the time, i just walk, slower then normal watching tourists checking their sight seeing maps then checking local land marks then checking their maps again, they look confused. The London Eye is infront and across the river and the Parliament building is to your right. Easy. My one and only stop on my way to work is a small Tesco with a small corridor filled with undecided shoppers. I look in, see the hopelessness of getting in and out with my weekend usual so i turn and leave empty handed. Now i have to walk a little out of my way to the next little Tesco, but Fuck it, its a beautiful day, and so i walk on passing the giant entrence to Westminister Abbey surrounded by its gothic architecture, the lawns in front are filled with resting walkers still taking pictures. The second Tesco is a little bigger, but more importantly it has what i wanted, so i grab a bottle of water, which i'm drinking now, a sandwich (Chicken salad) two bottles of Diet Coke (gotta watch my figure ;P) a Twix extra and a box of Go Ahead biscuits, strawberry favour. I need the sugar to keep me awake for the next 12 hours.

By now its nearly a quarter to seven, and i still need to do an external check on the building before i go inside. Its a habit. Check done and i enter the building a little after, heading strait throught the reception and into the showroom filled with "buyers" checking out next seasons crapola. I stash my grub in the fridge then go back the reception for the Handover of Responsibility.

I am now, and will be until 7am tomorrow, responsible for this building and its contents. Overall value about 25 million pounds, but to me, its just bricks and rags.


The moral of this story is;
"Why the fuck do we have to work on days such as this, it ain't right and should be a crime"


Have a happy Sunday folks, enjoy it, get the most out of it, for tomorrow is Monday.

Fatal Flaw.

We all have them right, each and every one of us has at least one flaw which dicataes our lives.

Last night i started to think a little about mine. Laziness. No matter how passionate i am about something. Or how motivated i am. I can never seem to shake off the laziness that, it seems i've had for longer then i originally thought.

I figured it started after my redundency back in 2004, i took a year off work and lived on my redundency money, i would spend days. Even weeks doing nothing but watching TV and or DVD's, during that time i gained a little weight, which i still have, and no matter how much i talked to myself about starting to exercise, i never did.

But that, ithink, wasn't where it began, as a kid, i would get home from school and instead of doing my home work i'd play video games or sit watching TV, no biggy right all kids do that, but even then i'd still sit watching crap because i didn't what to do the home work. Now even though i have tons of writing projects to do, i still feel like i'd rather just sit watching TV/DVD's.

Back in 2004/2005 i decided that i wanted to write film scripts, if i'd put in the work back then i'd have at least 10, maybe 15 finished scripts. But how many do i have in stead, well i'll tell ya, exactly 3, and the first one i hated so didn't even think about doing a rewrite. The second is in rewrite limbo and the third is collecting dust waiting for me to do something with it.

In the beginning, i didn't write very often because i never really believed that i could sell one, so subconsciously i suppose i thought "whats the point" so not writing very much wasn't really that big of a deal, i never had the confidence, but later, when i found it, buried deep inside me i used my old  unconfidence self as an excuse to cover the real problem. Laziness.

A few months back i decided i was going to writing 4 blogs. Go to my profile page to see them.

This one, i was going to write a few a week, just a "Whats on my mind" thing. The second 'Fisky's Movies Review', i was going to add one a week, reviewing films i liked or disliked, it didn't matter, the third 'Doors of my Subconscious' is a series of short stories, i've written three so far, but even they are over a year old and i haven't written one sinse then, and the fourth is a company one 'Fisk Film' where i'd write about what the company is doing, which at this point is nothing. I wanted so many blogs because i thought it might force me to do them, but then i have no obligation to, so why should i? Laziness Strikes Back.

And over the last few weeks i decided i was going to write a Novel, which is suffering from the same tired routine, i'd just rather sit on my ass and watch TV/DVD's.

Now, i know what my fatal flaw is, its Laziness. I also know how to over come this flaw, i need to stay busy long enough to develope a routine of writing, get to the point where i just do it, not because i need to, but because i what to. The past has shown me that when i'm busy i can work all day long, no problem. In fact i profer to work hard all day then sit on my ass doing nothing. Of course having no work to do when i'm actually at work isn't helping matters, i use a Mac at home and a PC here, the Mac will read the PC files just fine (.doc) but the word processor i use on my Mac (Pages) isn't recognised on PC's, so i have to convert everything to Rich Text Format (rtf) files so i can transfer and open files on both computers, but i loss any formatting i have. For scripts i use Final Draft (fdr) which, unless i buy a new PC version of Final Draft i can't open at all on the work PC, and using RTF, is out of the question because the format is important. I have done it before but spent hours reformating it in Final Draft, which is more trouble then its worth, not to mention the time wasted.

Summary: My flaw is, Laziness. to over come this flaw i need to force myself to work every day until i fall into a routine.

Cover Art

I had the crazy idea that i could write a novel and recently i started to write it, a book, novel, novella i'll decide when its finished which category it fits into. I started by getting familiar with the characters and so set about writing character bios for the two main characters, plus a little research on the subject matter, to which i have already, in a previous blog, mentioned that its a Spy Thriller that has a complex sub-genre. 

I've written half of the first chapter, which i was eager to start so i used part of a bio i wrote, just to get started and today i designed the cover art work, of course this may change, but for right now its all i've got. Yea i know, its a little dark but it does fit the story floating around in my head, which changes from time to time, like earlier today, i was completely convinced i knew the plot, but on the way to my local chip shop i saw a Crow on the grass and things started to change, the Crow just gave me a simple change, but it got my thought processes going and i started to think more about the shady parts of the story, the more complex stuff, and then decided on a significant change to the plot, i love writing, i love the way it evolves in my head, happily it happened before i wrote it.

Write what you know...?

I'm reading a book by Stephen King, no not that kind of book, its called 'On Writing by Stephen King', the first hundred or so pages are basically a brief biography centred around how he became a writer, and the rest are his thoughts on how to go about becoming a writer.

Don't get me wrong, he's not saying, Do what i do or Do as i say, he gives a rough guide to those of us who are aspiring writes, those of us who believe we have something to offer, he gives a starting point, he also tells us how he goes about the writing process, preferring to sit and start rather then spending time in character development or writing up plot guide lines, he said that if he is wrting a suspence thirller and he isn't exactly sure of what is going to happen next, then neither is the audience, i guess that makes sense however daunting it may seem, to start a book of roughly one hundred thousand words or more and not know how its going to turn out, but i guess thats what being a writer is all about. Take this blog, i had no idea what i was going to write, i just sat down and started. I have a character and a situation to solve, or not, so i have a starting point, and tonight i'm going to start the first chapter of my book.

King also said that routine is important, and that you should write a set amount every day, and read lots of books, these of course stand to reason, but also that, for the beginner, imitationis a given. We all have our favorite genres, i for one like Horror, Spy thrillers and Sci-Fi, so i guess i'll be writing along those lines, i also like to read them and that my first few books would be imitations of what i have read, as i read this in On Writing i thought about my idea, which is an imitation, after reading that i felt a little better about doing it that way. King says to set a daily target like one thousand words, roughly 5 pages, to "shut the door" which i though was a metaphor for shut out everything including your family and friends, he said to allow yourself to shut that door, if you have a window close the curtains unless your view is of a brick wall, i guess to shut out all distractions, unplug the television if one is near so your not temped to turn it on and catch your shows, Television he says gets in the way of writing, finish your daily target then watch your shows. King says that he listens to loud rock music while he writes, it helps to block out any other noise that might encroach.

Write what you know, we here this all the time but does it really work that way, i think not, neither does King, a referrence he used was The Firm by John Grisham, about an attorney working for the Mafia, now, Grisham was an attorney at some point but, as King says, i'm pretty sure he didn't and never has worked for the Mob, but The Firm is a believable depiction of it. So even though writing what you know is a good idea, its not a rule of writing, writers can always pull on their imaginations, after all isn't that what fiction is.

Well, without knowing how this blog was going to turn out or what i was going to write in it, it turned out okay.