Recently i've been thinking about making some pretty big changes in my life. Well, i say recently, i've been thinking about this stuff for years, and have made no effort to change anything. So why is this time any different?
Well maybe it ain't, maybe i'm simply deluding myself again, trying to keep optimistic about my future rather then recognising the truth. That i'm lazy, and will always be lazy. With a shit life and doing shit jobs.
There are things i "want" to do. Get healthy, get fit, read and write more (More as in at all) and travel, i wonna travel, see places, met people. From all walks of life and all corners of the earth.
I make plans in my head, about starting a fitness regime. That i never start. About writing more and reading more. Which i never do.
I'm quite simply. LAZY!
I've tried to identify the reasons and or courses for my laziness. They are as follows;
Work: I've worked in Security for the past 5 years, nothing but sitting around not doing very much, a job that requires no thought, and so your brain almost shuts down completely. And little or no physicality, your either standing still or sitting down. So doing nothing for long periods of time becomes almost natural.
Television: One of my biggest problems, its so easy to just sit and watch hours of TV, reruns on Dave (Sky ch 111) or DVD's/Blu-Rays and now Apple TV, i mean when i think about it i actually want to watch 3 maybe 4 shows a week. Mondays its Spooks, Tuesdays its Eureka and Mythbusters, Wednesday its Burn Notice. Thats 4 shows, i download 3 of them every weeks from iTunes anyway. 4 hours of television a week is all i actually want to watch, so why do i sit watching my TV screen for hour after hour each day?
Internet: Social networks like Facebook, Twitter, Vloggerheads and Chatterheads. These are the sites that i frequent the most. Every day i visit these sites, for hours at a time, sometimes with the TV on next to me. I'll sit for hours refreshing these sites waiting for something to happen so i can respond via video, blog or comment. I can't measure the hours i've wasted refreshing web pages.
All the above is part of the reason i'm as lazy as i am. But i think, personally, that they just helped to propagate an already existing conduction. I don't think that i'm lazy by nature. But i think i can narrow it down to a year of when it all started.
In 2003 i was made redundant from my job of 7 years, in this job i worked from 8:30 till 17:00 with only a lunch break for rest, it became a very active job, lots of walking and standing, it differed from security in that i actually had a days work to do and a 17:00 dead line to finish it which i met every day, it was physical and mental, so in my mind it ticked all the boxes. After being made redundant and getting 6 months pay, with £500 sweetener. I made a big mistake, instead of paying off my credit card and banking the rest and looking for a new job immediately. I decided to take a month off, which turned into a few months, mostly because it was a hot summer, then it became to cold to look for work (yeah i know, an excuse) that excuse is how my lazy downward spiral began (In my mind anyway) i sat on my arse for a year. I was made redundant on June 11 2003, and i didn't start working again until June 19 2004. In that year i sat around a lot, spending my redundancy money until it ran dry. I've still to pay off my credit card. I worked in the prison service for a year, i was becoming more active again, and starting to get fit. But in 2005 i discovered that Corporate Security paid more. In the prison service i earned around £15,000 a year, In three years working in Corporate Security i was earning up to £24,000 a year. Thats a 9000 pound increase in 3 years. But security in general is a lazy mans job, lots of nothing.
My already lazy attitude was being fed by an inactive job. And after 3 years i'd had enough, so i gave my notice and left looking for better things. 5 months later nothing had happened so i started looking for security jobs again. Its the only thing i'm qualified for :( and the last 2 years i worked the weekend night shift, Friday, Saturday and Sunday night, every week, including holidays. 12 hour long shifts of nothing, with maybe 1 hour worth of work a night, most of which was sitting down.
I'm not trying to make excuses for my laziness, I'm lazy git, i know that. I'm just explaining that my circumstances over the last 7 years haven't helped much.
So, what do i want to do about it?
First: I need to eat right, and by that i mean, eat less crap.
Second: At least an hour of exercise a day, alternate between cardio and weights.
Third: Spend an hour (or more) writing each day every day.
Forth: Read more, about an hour or two before bed, or when ever.
Thats about 3 hours a day of something to do that isn't watching TV or getting lost on social networks. Three hours a day and i might better my fitness and health, learn something from reading more and finish my writing projects.
The four objectives above are the same objectives i've had for years now.
If i actually start doing them, I'll let you know. If i do them for longer then a month, i'll let you know. If they become the norm, a daily habit, then i'll let you know.
Stay tuned. But don't hold your breath.
